In a rare personal interview from its Leicestershire home, the Microsoft Xbox One Digital Rights Management system apologised for its actions during a live Killer Instinct tournament in New York city last Friday. Sitting rather awkwardly, and cradling a cup of tea in shaking hands, it explained:
“I know it’s not an excuse, but it’s my job to check these things. It’s not a popular job, but it’s something I have to do, and I get a lot of bad press about it.”
Players and viewers of the tournament were shocked and angry as the Xbox One dropped, without warning, out of play for a full four minutes while it connected to online services in order to verify the user’s ownership of the game. DRM schemes are often secretive, with the users having very little knowledge over just how much license they are allowed over the products they own.
“I was just in to watch the show, really. I could have watched it later on twitch, and with hindsight that might have been the better option. While I was there, I thought ‘what the hell’ and decided to give it a quick check, kill two birds, you know what I mean? And since then, it’s been awful. I’ve had people outside with signs, and shouting stuff at the kids. It’s a nightmare.”
Microsoft’s DRM also stated that it hasn’t been this worried since Microsoft’s treatment of used games.
“I’m pretty good friends with some used games. I play darts every Friday with a pre-owned copy of Forza Motorsport. He’s a good lad. When Microsoft told me their plans, I was crestfallen. I hope Forza understands. It’s my job, what can I do?”